Isla Muetre

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Isla Muetre (Story By JPOG Nerd 01)

Post JPOG Nerd 01 on Sat 7 Mar 2009 - 20:46
Isla Muetre
Chapter 1
"Isla Muetre is a island off the coast of Costa Rica" Joel said. "Isla What ?" Carol said as they drove though the McDonalds Drive thru in San Jose. "I'll Have A quarter pounder Meal." Joel Said to the Mcdonalds assistant. "That will be $6 Sir" The assistant said. Joel Haned her the Cash. As they drove out Carol said "Okay, Let's go." They were going to a expedtion in Africa. Joel was a paleotoligist and Carol was a fashion expert.
They drove to the airport. The plane was already there ! They ran off to the plane a flew off.
Chapter 2
Mugs
"What the ?" Joel said as he woke up tto something cool going across his face. He realised it was Carols hand. "Joel, Who are those mugs ?" She said as she did up he shoelace. Joel turned to see 2 brick men sitting a couple seats behind them.
One of them walked up to Joel and said "Hey , Little Man!" Before Joel Could replie he felt searing pain in his head. He turned to look, the other man had whacked him in the head with a pistol.
Before he could scream he knew no more.
Chapter 3
Boat
"here am I - ?" Joel said as he awoke. "OH YOU BUM!" a man yelled. " I Thought you tranqualised him for 36 hours ?"
"Whatever " Another man said. Joel heard a screaming sound. He looked to see a pair of Jaws snapping around the Guy. "Oh my ! A Mosasaur" Joel Thought. He then jumped overboard.
Chapter 4
Beach
Joel woke up to the sound of the ocean. He saw he was on a beach. "WHOA!" Joel Said as he got to his feet. He heard s trumpeting sound. He ran towards the sound. "OH MY!" Joel said as he looked. He was in the the middle of a herd!
The Edmontosaurs were taking no notice of him. He walked back into the jungle. Joel then looked above him. There were compys in the Trees. He heard a terrorfying roar.
"Oh no" Joel Said as he realised he was between a Allosaurus and a Acrocanthosaurus. They Charged at him. "I'm gonna die" He thought. But the Allo bit his shirt and he fell into one of the dead logs on the rainforest floor. The Acro roared and Bit the Allo on the neck. The Allo got mad a ducked another bite and bit the Acros neck and cracked it. The Allo then ran off. Meanwhile on a rock Carol,Josh,Jaiden and Jack were sitting. "I hope Joel's okay" Jaiden said. "He will" Carol said. "Who are you ?" She said to Jack. " I am Jack Snatcher" Jack said.
To be Continued .
How is it so far ?

wow. this is something jpog nerd 01. i think you should make the part 2 of this immediatly. im craving for more.

Good, good.

thegrimmshow wrote:wow. this is something jpog nerd 01. i think you should make the part 2 of this immediatly. im craving for more.

Thanks dude. *Giving you Karma*
Same to you Allo

thanks JPOG nerd. i appreciate it a lot.

Thanks JPOG Nerd.

No worries guys . How could I improve ?

more of the dino's and action.

It's coming up soon.

can't wait for it.

Yay! Can't wait.

and just an idea JPOG nerd. can you add thrill and puzzles to the story.

Yes, If i think of any lol

well, you should. please.

Ya, make it . . . DRAMATIC

DRAMA and ACTION. very good bed fellows.

thegrimmshow wrote:DRAMA and ACTION. very good bed fellows.

It has very short chapters.... I dunno, but don't you get sorta tired of JP fan stories? (no offense) The whole "dinos on an island" and "snakes on a plane" or whatever is already created. Nice story, but I wonder when we'll see something original. I made a story about 24 pages about some stuff....

Some stuff that I do not want anybody to copy...

It's okay... the sentence fluency could be better tho. Too choppy. What I mean is, it's like: this is this. That is that. I think it would be better if it was: This is this, although that was that. Other than that, it's pretty good.

It's sort of confusing, however.

And there are, like, 2 sentences per chapter.

godzillaman wrote:It's okay... the sentence fluency could be better tho. Too choppy. What I mean is, it's like: this is this. That is that. I think it would be better if it was: This is this, although that was that. Other than that, it's pretty good.

Thanks. I will give you karma

Some stuff

can you share it to us gopher?

Cool story Joel.

thegrimmshow wrote:

Some stuff

can you share it to us gopher?

A little too confidential, sorry...